When you are a parent, your biggest anxieties are always related to your kids. You want them to be healthy, do well, grow and be liked by their surroundings, and when something is off it is just a killing feeling that truly and utterly hurts.
The other day my eldest once again experienced a play date being cancelled on her. It was one with her friend, where the feedback from the friends parents were that they were currently exploring expanding their daughters circle of friends and had thus already made alternative arrangements with another girl.
While my rational side could understand and perhaps even sympathize with what they were trying to do, I felt hurt on behalf of my daughter. Not only because it was a deja vu feeling dating years back when I myself struggled to make friends and have play dates, but also because of something else;
When you are two parties or business partners, and one of them unilaterally makes a decision to do something else and explore other options, it may feel good and right for the one who makes the move.
But the other one gets left behind. Outside. Abandoned. Perhaps even due to no fault of their own.
You can make choices. And you absolutely should. It is only natural. But choices have consequences. And at the end of your choice, the consequences are being felt by real people.
If the relationship is strong, important and have been built over time, you should at the very least make the effort to empathize and see the situation from the other partys side, before you make your call.
Some times it will not make a dent, and you will stick by your original. For a number of whatever reasons.
But other times just turning the tables and looking at what the consequences are for those, your decision has a direct impact on, will help you get a new perspective, think about the relationship and what’s really at stake.
Maybe you could get inspired and learn something new. And perhaps even get to a different decision.
A decision that may be a small contribution to a more compassionate and caring world, which I would argue we could all benefit from.